Thursday, December 31, 2015

Walmart Shopping List For New Year's Eve

  • Ski Masks
  • Machete
  • Knives
  • Duct tape
  • Zip ties
  • Ammonia

Shouldn't there be a waiting period & background check for purchasing these items together?


Friday, December 25, 2015

Letter To Santa

Dear Santa,
How are you? How is Mrs. Claus? I hope everyone, from the reindeer to the elves, is fine. I have been a very good boy this year. I would like an X-Box 360 with Call of Duty IV and an iPhone 9 for Christmas. I hope you remember that come Christmas Day. Merry Christmas, Timmy Jones
Dear Timmy,
Thank you for your letter. Mrs. Claus, the reindeer and the elves are all fine and thank you for asking about them. Santa is a little worried all the time you spend playing video games and texting. Santa wouldn't want you to get fat. Since you have indeed been a good boy, I think I'll bring you something you can go outside and play with.
Merry Christmas, Santa Claus
Mr. Claus,
Seeing that I have fulfilled the "naughty vs. nice" contract, set by you I might add, I feel confident that you can see your way clear to granting me what I have asked for. I certainly wouldn't want to turn this joyous season into one of litigation. Also, don't you think that a jibe at my weight coming from an overweight man who goes out once a year is a bit trite?
Respectfully, Tim Jones
Mr. Jones,
While I have acknowledged you have met the "nice" criteria, need I remind you that your Christmas list is a request and in no way is it a guarantee of services provided. Should you wish to pursue legal action, well that is your right. Please know, however, that my attorneys have been on retainer ever since the Burgermeister Meisterburger incident and will be more than happy to take you on in open court. Additionally, the exercise I alluded to will not only improve your health, but also improve your social skills and potentially help clear up a complexion that looks like the bottom of the Burger King fry bin most days.
Very Truly Yours, S Claus
Now look here Fat Man,
I told you what I want and I expect you to bring it. I was attempting to be polite about this but you brought my looks and my friends into this. Now you just be disrespecting me. I'm about to tweet my boys and we're gonna be waiting for your fat ass and I'm taking my game console, my game, my phone, and whatever else I want. WHAT EVER I WANT, MAN!
Listen Pizza Face,
Seriously??? You think a dude that breaks into every house in the world on one night and never gets caught sweats a skinny g-banger wannabe? "He sees you when you're sleeping; He knows when you're awake". Sound familiar, genius? You know what kind of resources I have at my disposal. I got your shit wired, Jack. I go all around the world and see ways to hurt people that if I described them right now, you'd throw up your Totino's pizza roll all over the carpet of your mom's basement. You're not getting what you asked for, but I'm still stopping by your crib to stomp a mud hole in your ass and then walk it dry. Chew on that, Petunia.
S Claus
Dear Santa,
Bring me whatever you see fit. I'll appreciate anything.

That's what I thought you little bastard.

Thursday, December 24, 2015

Tuesday, December 22, 2015

Political Correctness Is Like A Disease

About The Office Party ...

Company Memo
FROM:    Patty Lewis, Human Resources Director
TO:         All Employees
DATE:    November 1, 2012
RE:       Gala Christmas Party
I'm happy to inform you that the company Christmas Party will take place on December 23rd, starting at noon in the private function room at the Grill House.
There will be a cash bar and plenty of drinks!  We'll have a small band playing traditional carols... feel free to sing along.  And don't be surprised if our CEO shows up dressed as Santa Claus!
A Christmas tree will be lit at 1:00 PM.  Exchanges of gifts among employees can be done at that time; however, no gift should be over $10.00 to make the giving of gifts easy for everyone's pockets.
This gathering is only for employees!
Our CEO will make a special announcement at that time!
Merry Christmas to you and your family,
Company Memo
FROM:    Patty Lewis, Human Resources Director
TO:         All Employees
DATE:    November 2, 20102
RE:       Gala  Holiday  Party
In no way was yesterday's memo intended to exclude our Jewish employees.  We recognize that  Hanukkah is an important holiday, which often coincides with Christmas, though unfortunately not this year.
However, from now on,  we're calling it our "Holiday Party."  The same policy applies to any other employees who are not Christians and to those still celebrating Reconciliation Day.
There will be no Christmas tree and no Christmas carols will be sung.
We will have other types of music for your enjoyment.
Happy now?
Happy Holidays to you and your family,
 Company Memo
FROM:   Patty Lewis, Human Resources Director
TO:        All Employees
DATE:   November 3, 2012
RE:         Holiday  Party
Regarding the note I received from a member of Alcoholics Anonymous requesting a non-drinking table, you didn't sign your name...
I'm happy to accommodate this request, but if I put a sign on a table that  reads, "AA Only", you wouldn't be anonymous anymore.  How am I supposed to handle this?
And sorry, but forget about the gift exchange, no gifts are allowed since the union members feel that $10.00 is too much money and the executives believe $10.00 is a little chintzy.
 Company Memo
FROM:  Patty Lewis, Human Resources Director
To:        All Employees
DATE:   November 4, 2012
RE:        Generic  Holiday  Party
What a diverse group we are!  I had no idea that December 20thbegins the Muslim holy month of Ramadan, which forbids eating and drinking during daylight hours.
There goes the party!  Seriously, we can appreciate how a luncheon at this time of year does not accommodate our Muslim employees' beliefs.  Perhaps the Grill House can hold off on serving your meal until the end of the party or else package everything for you to take it home in little foil doggy baggy.  Will that work?
Meanwhile, I've arranged for members of Weight Watchers to sit farthest from the dessert buffet, and pregnant women will get the table closest to the restrooms.
Gays are allowed to sit with each other.  Lesbians do not have to sit with Gay men, each group will have their own table.
Yes, there will be flower arrangement for the Gay men's table.
To the person asking permission to cross dress, the Grill House asks that no cross-dressing be allowed, apparently because of concerns about confusion in the restrooms.  Sorry.
We will have booster seats for short people.
Low-fat food will be available for those on a diet.
I am sorry to report that we cannot control the amount of salt used in the food .  The Grill House suggests that people with high blood pressure taste a bite first.
There will be fresh "low sugar" fruits as dessert for diabetics, but the restaurant cannot supply "no sugar" desserts. Sorry!
Did I miss anything?!?!?
Company Memo
FROM:   Patty Lewis, Human Resources Director
TO:         All F*%^ing Employees
DATE:    November  5, 2012
RE:         The F*%^ing Holiday Party
I've had it with you vegetarian pricks!!!  We're going to keep this party at the Grill House whether you like it or not, so you can sit quietly at the table furthest from the "grill of death," as you so quaintly put it, and you'll get your f*%^ing salad bar, including organic tomatoes.
But you know, tomatoes have feelings, too.  They scream when you slice them.  I've heard them scream.  I'm hearing them scream right NOW!
The rest of you f*%^ing wierdos can kiss my *ss.  I hope you all have a rotten holiday!
Drive drunk and die,
The B*tch from H*ll!!!
 Company Memo
FROM:  Joan Bishop, Acting Human Resources Director
DATE:   November  6, 2012
RE:       Patty Lewis and  Holiday  Party
I'm sure I speak for all of us in wishing Patty Lewis a speedy recovery from her recent nervous breakdown and I'll continue to forward your cards to her at the asylum.
In the meantime, management has decided to cancel our Holiday Party and give everyone the afternoon of the 23rd off with full pay.
Happy Whatever!

Thursday, December 17, 2015

Tuesday, December 15, 2015



  • Nurses & security guard relied on CPR!
  • Employee who suffered heart attack is in intensive care unit at hospital.


Does anyone know?

Point ... Counter-Point ...

Excerpt ~ Letter to Editor, Greece Post, 12/10/15

Communicate tax facts better!

Finance Director Paul Holahan’s recent letter to the editor, “2016 town budget...” (GP 12/10) is a welcome addition to public discussion.  I hope he continues.

Readers may recall another recent essay by Supervisor Bill Reilich and Greece Town Board (GP 11/12).  Their headline said, “The 2016 proposed budget – No tax increase for residents”.

To many, this sounds good – maybe too good, so what does it mean?

Does it mean all residents... including renters?  Arguably all [nearly all] adult residents pay property taxes directly or indirectly.

Does it mean all residents regardless of increasing taxable valuation/assessment e.g. re-assessments or declining exemptions etc?

Does it mean NO businesses, even though they pass the cost of higher taxes on to customers?

What were the numbers when the Board proofed the statement before publishing their essay?

The budget says taxes for 2016 (total all tax bills, $37.7 million) will exceed 2015.  Conversely, the Board essay says, “...No tax increase for residents”!  So, who pays the tax increase?

Director Holahan says it’s development in the town.  Okay, what is the assessment growth in residential, business, industrial etc?  How well is COMIDA working?

While the budget alone may add up, the budget and the essay don’t square one-to-the-other!

George Hubbard
Greece Resident

PS: Figures taken from “ONE PAGE SUMMARY OF THE TOWN’S 2016 BUDGET”.

Monday, December 14, 2015

ATHS Guard Revived After Student Fight

A Greece Central School District security guard suffered a heart attack Monday morning after breaking up a fight in a high school cafeteria.

According to a statement released by the district, the security guard at Greece Athena High School went into cardiac arrest after breaking up a fight between two girls.
The guard had to be resuscitated by two school nurses using CPR. He was taken to the hospital for evaluation.
According to the district, the school was in a lockdown during the medical emergency, but the measure was lifted shortly thereafter.
The guard is recovering at the hospital.
A 16 year old female student was later arrested and charged with harassment and disorderly conduct.

Sunday, December 13, 2015

Stabbings, Gang Activity

Greece police are looking for a suspect after a stabbing inside of a Denny's early Sunday morning. Police were called to the restaurant on West Ridge Road just after 3 a.m.
They said a man was stabbed twice in the torso after a fight with another person in the restaurant. No word on the extent of his injuries.
He was taken to a local hospital by Monroe Ambulance. Police said the suspect left the scene. (TWCNews)
A Greece teenager was taken to the hospital following a stabbing after a confrontation at a house party overnight in Rochester.
Police say the 19-year-old and his friends were confronted by another group * while leaving a party on Lake Avenue.
They say both parties ended up traveling to the other side of the city where a fight broke out and the teen was stabbed.
He was transported from Hudson Avenue to Rochester General Hospital with a non-life threatening stab wound to the midsection. (TWCNews)

* Group = gang

Thursday, December 10, 2015

'No Apologies: Merritt Rahn Breaks His Silence'


Former Greece police chief Merritt Rahn sat down with Time Warner Cable News anchor Casey Bortnick in an exclusive interview to air Thursday night at 6 & 10 PM on Time-Warner Cable News.

"Rahn served 28 months of a five year prison sentence for tampering with public records, falsely reporting an incident, and official misconduct. He maintains his innocence and shares his version of these events in the Time Warner Cable News special "No Apologies: Merritt Rahn Breaks His Silence."  
Rahn not only denies covering up a crash involving one of his officers, he says he strongly opposed the hiring of another officer who was later convicted of using his badge to try to coerce two women into having sex. Rahn's former deputy chief believes the depositions from a recently settled civil trial against the town of Greece shed new light on Rahn's case.
"Somebody's not telling the truth. That's one of the reasons I support Merritt. I know what went down during that 2009 incident and my feeling is that he was not treated fairly," said Bill Mackin.
"I think the whole shredding thing and the gun being stolen and not reporting it on time was all just puff. I think it was a political trial and I think Auberger didn't go in and tell the truth about things," said John Parrinello, Rahn's attorney."

Wednesday, December 02, 2015

Top Cops Visit Media @Marketplace Mall

Seen on the noon news on WHEC today ~~ One of the Greece PD's Deputy Chiefs and his side-kick Jared Renee. They appeared for an interview regarding the Pirate Toy Fund.

Couldn't they wait until later this week when the televised segment will take place at Greece Ridge mall?

Were they paid for their time & excursion?